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Episode 106. Blunderbust Braggart's Demands

Book 1 - Episode 106 - Blunderbust Braggart's Demands

Context

Coordinated Universal Time
Thursday, November 14, 2024 - 7:12 p.m.
Location
  • Tellar Prime
  • Zorek Spaceport
  • USS Enterprise
  • Tarsi's Cabin
Timeline
Schak'Irra Timeline
Previously on Trek Outta Time

As repairs to the Enterprise were nearing completion, an explosion destroyed Gornok's workshop at Zorek Spaceport. The Orion pirates, backed by Blunderbust Braggart, launched a surprise attack to seize the starship. Without power, the saucer remained vulnerable while Lingua tried to lock down access points. Agnes, T'Met, and Gornok recovered weapons from Schak'Irra before joining Tarsi and K'hoka. The Orions take positions around the starship and move on the offensive.

Characters

Name Affiliation / Branch Title / Rank Species Original Timeline
Agnes V. Rodriguez NATO / Special Fleet Captain Human Schak'Irra Timeline
Vexoriana-Lyss'ra Tarsi Starfleet / Temporal Division Commander Andorian Prime Timeline
T'Met Starfleet / Temporal Division Captain Vulcan Prime Timeline
Lingua Starfleet / Temporal Division N/A Artificial Intelligence Prime Timeline
Gornok Zorek Entrepreneurs' Assembly Chief Tellarite Schak'Irra Timeline
K'hoka Khol'a Independent Étoile Diamantée des Astres Pétillants Orion Schak'Irra Timeline
Blunderbust Braggart Independent N/A Ferengi Schak'Irra Timeline
Orion Pirate Leader Orion Pirates Leader Orion Schak'Irra Timeline
Emilie Flores NATO / Special Fleet Ensign Human Schak'Irra Timeline

Manifest

USS Enterprise
Affiliation NATO
Location Docked at Zorek Spaceport
Captain Agnes V. Rodriguez
First Officer Angie Chen
Artificial Intelligence Lingua (Unofficial)
Pilot Eric Corda
Communications Emilie Flores
Operations Charlene Savea
Tactical Vexoriana-Lyss'ra Tarsi (Unofficial)
Science T'Met (Unofficial)
Advanced Weaponry Eros Vitos
Security Robert Gomard (Unofficial)
Sickbay Victor S. Calpel
Counselor/Consultant Manu
Custodian Manu
Passengers Robert Gomard's squad
4 Vulcan survivors from Schak'Irra
Emmanuel Macron
K'hoka Khol'a
Detainees Vladimir Joseph Putin and his bodyguards

TL;DR

The Orion privateers have managed to detach the Enterprise from the dock, and Blunderbust Braggart speaks up: he is occupying the bridge, holding several officers hostage, and demanding tribute: 500 bars of latinum, Gornok, K'hoka, and T'Met. Lingua expands her operating perimeter and tries to isolate the crew; Tarsi wants to strike back at once, K'hoka wants the Ferengi's hide, and Agnes slams the brakes because lives are at stake. While Gornok wrestles with his passwords, the tension rises: they need a plan, and fast.

Story

Just as we were about to counterattack and retake control of the Enterprise, the mechanical arms keeping the starship docked at Zorek Spaceport retract. Three small Orion privateers launch their grapnels onto the hull and prepare to tow us away.

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

Lingua, moor the Enterprise back to the dock right now!

Lingua

Audio channel

I am sorry, Captain Rodriguez, the spaceport mooring arms are not under my control. You will need to ask the Tellarite authorities to redeploy them.

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

Why did they do that?

Capt. T'Met

It is logical to assume that the Orion pirates who failed to board have taken control of the mooring arms without the Tellarites' consent.

Gornok

Grr... Give me two seconds. As a member of the Zorek Entrepreneurs' Assembly, Gornok can solve this little issue, provided I can remember my password.

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

Hurry up, Gornok!

Gornok pulls out his pad and tries to access the mooring-arm controls. I wait anxiously beside him, tapping my foot. He tries several passwords but cannot seem to remember the right one.

Gornok

Grr... "Mak-Jivr'he"... Hmm... No, that is not it... Maybe "Faisseubouk'"... Not that either... Or maybe it is the name of my cousin Vinuk's third wife's fourth child. What was he called again? Blast it, I cannot remember...

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

Faster, Gornok!!!

Gornok

There, found it! Now the program is asking me to confirm that I am of legal age. I type YES... Next step, loading data... 25%... 50%... 75%... 99%... Just a little more patience, Captain, it is coming...

Cmdr. Vexoriana-Lyss'ra Tarsi

Too late! Look through the window. We are moving away from the spaceport...

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

[censored].

Cmdr. Vexoriana-Lyss'ra Tarsi

Do not despair, Agnes. A few miserable little Orions are not going to stop us. We have everything we need, do we not, Lingua?

Lingua

Audio channel

Yes, Commander Tarsi, but until Lieutenant Savea restores power to the saucer, I will be unable to assist you.

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

She said she needed half an hour.

Lingua

Audio channel

Lieutenant Savea has kept to the deadline. I have just felt a slight tickle in my neuroprocessors confirming that my operating perimeter has extended to the saucer and the bridge. Applying security protocols...

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

Perfect, Lingua. Isolate the crew separately from the pirates.

Lingua

Audio channel

Isolation in progress... Uh-oh... We have a new problem, Captain Rodriguez.

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

What now!

Lingua

Audio channel

Someone on the bridge is trying to broadcast across the starship. Should I intercept the transmission?

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

It is probably Emilie or Angie. Do not interfere, Lingua.

The speakers crackle, and a burst of feedback deafens us, making every one of us grimace in pain. After a few endless seconds, a nasal voice comes through, distorted by the badly adjusted microphone.

Blunderbust Braggart

Speaker

Hellooooo, hellooooo! This thing is not working. You pressed the wrong button again, you brainless green brute!

Orion Pirate Leader

Speaker

Just because you have repressed your stupidity does not make you intelligent, Great Braggart!

Blunderbust Braggart

Speaker

Do not ever dare say that I am stupid!

Orion Pirate Leader

Speaker

Oh no, I would never dare, Great Braggart! It is just that you do not know this technology. You should ask one of the prisoners we took while boarding for assistance.

Blunderbust Braggart

Speaker

On second thought, you seem brighter than you look... You, over there, the female in the little black skirt, come here and put me through to the starship!

Ens. Emilie Flores (Communications)

Speaker

You are already broadcasting to the crew, and they can hear you!

Blunderbust Braggart

Speaker

Ahem! Hello, hello! I am addressing the captain of this rust bucket! If you can hear me, know that I am currently occupying the command bridge and holding four of your contemptible officers. In exchange for their release, I demand that you deliver to me within one hour 500 bars of latinum, the fat Tellarite targ Gornok, the pointy-eared Vulcan stripper, and the green Orion female named Pay'Psy Khol'a...

Orion Pirate Leader

Speaker

Uh, Great Braggart, our fugitive is called K'hoka Khol'a...

Blunderbust Braggart

Speaker

Who cares what her name is, you great oaf! [clap]

The speakers fall silent, plunging the cabin into tense quiet. Our faces are frozen in expressions of surprise and indignation. We all look at one another, trying to digest the absurdity of the situation. Tarsi clenches her fists, her eyes flashing with determination. As for K'hoka, she grabs her mek'let and prepares to leave.

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

Whoa, K'hoka! Where do you think you are going?

K'hoka Khol'a

I am going to skin that pathetic little Ferengi blowhard!

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

First, calm down!

K'hoka Khol'a

I got you into this mess, so it is up to me to fix it!

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

I understand your position, but no! You are not touching the Ferengi!

Cmdr. Vexoriana-Lyss'ra Tarsi

What?! Have you lost your mind, Agnes?! He wants us to hand over K'hoka, T'Met, and Gornok, and you want to just stand here doing nothing?

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

That is not what I said. We are not going to charge in headfirst and risk lives! Between him and us, there are Orion pirates! On top of that, I have four officers being held hostage on the bridge, and I want them back in one piece!

Cmdr. Vexoriana-Lyss'ra Tarsi

Twenty-first-century Orions are brainless barbarians! K'hoka and I, with Lingua's help, can get rid of them without difficulty!

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

You are forgetting the privateers! There are three of them towing the Enterprise and taking us beyond the Tellar system!

Capt. T'Met

Orion privateers from this era are no match for the Schak'Irra weaponry that Gornok installed on the Enterprise.

Capt. Agnes V. Rodriguez

Fine, you all want to take on the pirates and that Ferengi, but before we do, we need a plan!

Gornok

Gornok likes plans, especially when they come together...